I wanted to write this blog post before Christmas, but it's still the Christmas season, so I will share a little of some of my not so quiet time with God.

There has been a few occasions in the past two years, where a song on the radio has completely crushed me, and made me bawl like a baby, and they both tie into my theme. The first occasion was Father's Day weekend 2010. We had just found out we were having girls and I as a crazy Father, went to Walmart and bought a big box of diapers for them. I was on cloud nine, so excited to be a Father, and so excited to meet these little girls. All of a sudden the song More, by Matthew West came on the radio.

Just a face in the city Just a tear on a crowded street But you are one in a million And you belong to me And I want you to know I'm not letting go Even when you come undone

I love you more than the sun And the stars that I taught how to shine You are mine and you shine for me too I love you Yesterday And today And tomorrow I'll say it again and again I love you more I love you more

God spoke in his super quiet voice... "Those girls you love so much, even though you haven't met them yet, well I love you so much more, so much more than you could even imagine." And I cried like a baby as I drove home.

The second time was just recently, right before Christmas. I was driving home from Walmart yet again, with a Christmas gift for Jaime in the car, and this time it was Chris Tomlin and How Great is Our God.

The same result happened. More crying...boy am I such a baby.

It was then that God started to put some pieces in to place.

1. Jesus would totally give gifts, and they wouldn't be lame gifts, they would be the best he could give. Case in point, he gave up heaven, came as a fragile little baby, and grew up without sin, and suffered and died, and rose from the dead, all for me. If I was the only person who ever lived, he still would have come.
2. God is so much bigger than anything I could ever imagine. And any and all attempts would completely blow my mind.

It was then that I began to think of the little baby in Jaime's belly, and how God was stitching everything together and crafting the child, and how he had been that very same baby 2000 some odd years ago.

Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb. I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration—what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I'd even lived one day. (Psalm 119:13-16).

For a child has been born—for us! the gift of a son—for us! He'll take over the running of the world. His names will be: Amazing Counselor, Strong God, Eternal Father, Prince of Wholeness. His ruling authority will grow, and there'll be no limits to the wholeness he brings. (Isaiah 9:5-7).

God had completely crushed me with how enormous the birth of Jesus was. Without the birth, there would be no death, no resurrection, no salvation, and the world would be headed to hell...Jesus suffered the first act of humility by becoming an embryo in the womb of a created being. He went through each and every one of the stages from poppy seed to lentil, to tomato, to baby. Sure we love Christmas and we love the gifts, but I'm not sure until this month did I completely ever take the time to reflect on it.